Let’s see. Should I start this off with a quote? Something literary perhaps. Nah, that way they’ll think I just want to impress people. How about that line from David Foster Wallace’s “This Is Water” speech that I liked so much? Tends to appeal to the angsty target group I’m after…
Wait. I’ve got it.
Hi, I’m down here. The video you just watched wasn’t made by me, but it did raise a point that holds a high personal value for me and, coincidentally, for this very blog. Simply put, this website is a response to my need to examine and be examined. And for the purpose of kickstarting this journey of web-based cross-examination, I need you. You, that is, anyone who gives enough of a damn to accompany me, online or offline, through the treacherous waters of approaching adulthood. Are you ready, recruit?
Aside from you, this blog is of course dedicated to that elusive yet shining figure that stars in about 90% of my daydreams. For the sake of clarity (and alliteration), let’s call him Future Phil. And from what I’ve heard, he’s a fine (though probably quite bald) fella. Another thing I know about him (a feature he admittedly shares with me) is that at any given moment, he imagines himself either on the cusp or right in the middle of creative paralysis. (Besides, he probably hasn’t rid himself of that irksome habit of overusing parentheses in his writing; but that’s a story for another time.)
You see, ever since I’ve been able to think about such things, I’ve considered myself a creative type. And when people’s self-image stands in stark contrast to reality — i.e. for a creative person, if their day-to-day preoccupations show a distinct lack of creation — they tend to get desperate. If necessary, they’ll even go so far as to shed their cloak of adolescent apathy in order to get a second look at the mirror that they hope will reveal them as the artists they were always destined to be.
For me, that call to arms sounded when I realized that I was spending far more time envying other people for following their dreams than advancing my own vision of what Future Phil could look like (apart from, you know, the bald head and whatnot). I’m well aware that, in the grand scheme of things, my story likely won’t play out as that epic adventure I’d always imagined myself to embark on; but even if I’ll have to one day surrender to the prospect of crushing mediocrity, I wouldn’t want to do it without a fight.
I may not grow to be as quotable as Socrates, but who’s to say that’s what makes a good writer? My quest, which I’m hereby offering you for examination and consideration, is to jump over all the hurdles that would otherwise prevent me from sharing my life with the world through writing.
What about you? Will you promise to get in touch?